Every two weeks, this section brings you controversial takes on global, national, and school oriented issues. Sometimes, these arguments spark conversation or even backlash.
However, both commentaries on our nation’s descent into chaos or an analysis of school policies pale in comparison to the seriousness of this article’s subject matter. As our final act as editors of the Opinion section, we want to take an official stance on what may be the most contentious topic to ever grace these pages.
The Opinion section does not endorse Valentine’s Day. It’s a scam! Capitalism at its finest. So this year, for the sake of our ideological commitments and absolutely/ definitely/positively no other reason, neither of us spent a single dime on flowers. Or chocolates. Or hand-written, wax-sealed, perfumescented love letters. Or anything pink, generally.
Why this vehement loathing for a seemingly innocent holiday, you ask? Perhaps under a different set of circumstances, things would be different. Perhaps if we were spending our Valentine’s Day night with our (non-existent) significant others instead of sitting in SB202 doing layout at computer six…
But until then, we’ll maintain our position for the following reasons:
It’s a corporate scam.
For all of you V-Day devotees: it’s okay! We get it! It’s easy to fall prey to the false promises of Hershey and Hallmark.
But don’t you think it’s suspicious that the holiday suddenly grew in popularity when printing companies realized they could profit off of card sales in the 1800s?
Do you think St. Valentine himself was popping heart-shaped chocolates and trading cleverly punny cards? Valentine’s Day celebrations are fueled by corporate greed, not the power of love.
It sends a bad message.
If there’s one aspect of the holiday that we can condone, it is showing appreciation for your loved ones. However, it doesn’t have to be February 14 to write a note of gratitude or give someone a bouquet.
Valentine’s Day propagates the narrative that you should only show your appreciation one day a year.
It’s a recipe for romantic disaster.
Each year, the standards for partners get higher. If a partner does not post on their Instagram story fast enough, get the “right” kind of flowers, or make a dinner reservation far enough in advance, they are likely to get an earful from their romantic counterpart. With social comparison at an all-time high, Valentine’s Day only worsens the “not good enough” epidemic.
In face, having a holiday designated to treating your significant other well is almost counterintuitive. Not that we can speak from experience, but it seems like a healthy relationship wouldn’t need a holiday to encourage romantic nights out or love letters. Valentine’s Day almost becomes an excuse: a magical hall pass to be less engaged on an everyday basis.
If the aforementioned points didn’t already convert you to the anti-Valentine’s Day dark side, we came up with a few other reasons that don’t warrant lengthier explanations:
• Red is not a flattering color.
• Lighting that many candles is a fire hazard (and forbidden by The Almanac).
• We should normalize being single.
• Conversation hearts taste like Pepto Bismol.
Valentine’s Day at Hotchkiss is an especially terrible version of the holiday. Cupid and whichever other romance gods exist must have a vendetta against all us single folk— it is literally impossible to find a single corner of the main building that has not been infiltrated by giggling couples exchanging flowers and chocolates.
At the same time, we recognize that there is some merit, almost, to a holiday that prioritizes relationships. The traditions we have here—matcho-matics, serenades, carnations— help us show appreciation for the people in our lives, even if it’s not in a romantic context. And maybe (let’s hope) one day it will be.
So, if you’re a fellow Valentine’s Day hater, just view the holiday as a time to spread love—platonically. Tell your friends, your family, or your teachers how much you appreciate them.
It’ll even cost less than a Hallmark card.
